All in One Mind
by DevilWench
Summary: Random One Shots. Staring LotR GW, Inu-Yasha
1. All in One Room

Well, here I am. I've got writer's block on my long fic right now, so, I'ma letting some of the filling out by writing this fic. Plus, It's funny and I thought it would make some people laugh! I hope it works. And I apologize in advance for any bad spelling! Gomen!  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own: Gundam Wing Jackie, she's a friend and I have no control over her Lord of the Rings Autumn, another friend who would kill me if I didn't put her in this! Inu-Yasha Anything else copyrighted that I didn't mention  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Jenn: ::Walks in through door in rear of room:: Hello? Anyone here? HellO?  
  
G-Boys: ::Appear in a poof of smoke::  
  
Duo: What the hell! ::Looks around::  
  
Heero: ::Pulls gun on Jenn::  
  
Jenn: Eeeepppp.  
  
Quatre: Heero! Don't do that!  
  
Heero: ::Grunts::  
  
Wufei: ::Yells:: Baka Onna! Where are we?  
  
Jenn: ::Glowers before walking up to Wufei and kneeing him in the balls:: At least I don't have such a pathetic weak spot! ::Grins::  
  
Quatre and Trowa: ::Pales and hold onto 'weak spot:'::  
  
Duo: ::Looks stunned:: Wow Babe!  
  
Jenn: ::Glares::  
  
Duo: ::Imitates Quatre and Trowa::  
  
Jackie: ::walks in through door:: DUO!!!!!! ::Glomps him::  
  
Duo: ::Doesn't know whether to scream or enjoy the glomp::  
  
Wufei: ::Writhes in pain on floor::  
  
Jenn: ::Blinks::  
  
~ A Bright light fills the area and the Fellowship of the ring falls from the sky ~  
  
Frodo: Where are we?  
  
Everyone but Jenn and Jackie: ::shrugs::  
  
Sam: Well who's hungry. We have some nice crispy bacon and eggs!  
  
Jenn: ::Looks green:: Eggs.make.me .sick.  
  
Merry and Pippin: ::Tackles Boromir::  
  
Merry, Pippin, Boromir: ::Wrestles on floor::  
  
Gandalf: ::Remains silent:: ~ He doesn't know what's going on! ~  
  
Legolas: ::Looks around and sees Jenn. Blushes slightly::  
  
Jenn: ::Stares at Elf:: weird.. didn't think THIS would happen...  
  
Duo and Jackie: ::Cuddle in corner::  
  
Jenn: ::looks over and snorts:: Figures!  
  
Autumn: ::Enters through door:: HI!  
  
Everyone: ::Looks at her::  
  
Autumn: ::Sweatdrops:: heh heh heh..  
  
Aragorn: Where's Arawen? (Sorry if I spell bad. I'm too lazy to get my books)  
  
Gimlie: ::Grunts and sits in another corner::  
  
Frodo and Sam: ::Sit and eat::  
  
Trowa and Quatre: ::Sit in another corner doing something I don't want to know about::  
  
Jenn: ::Pokes Legolas::  
  
Legolas: ::Blinks:: What was that for?  
  
Jenn: ::Studies elf::  
  
Legolas: ::Sweatdrops under scrutiny::  
  
Jenn: ::Glomps Legolas:: CUTE!  
  
Legolas: ::Looks worried::  
  
Wufei: ::Still on floor in pain:: Damn onna!  
  
Jenn: ::Giggles::  
  
Legolas: ::kisses top of Jenn's head::  
  
Jenn: ::Blushes::  
  
Jackie: ::Laughs from corner:: INNOCENT!!!!!!!!  
  
Jenn: ::Glares at Jackie::  
  
Jackie: ::Goes back to playing with Duo::  
  
Jenn: ::Sweatdrops::  
  
Legolas: ::Hugs Jenn::  
  
Autumn: Wahhh..I got no one for me!!! ::Cries::  
  
Inu-Yasha cast: ::Appears:: What??????  
  
Autumn: YAY!!!! ::Glomps Naraku::  
  
Jackie:: Looks at Sesshomaru:: O.O ::Drools::  
  
Duo: Hey! What about me?  
  
Jackie: ::Glomps Sesshomaru:: Threesome?  
  
Sesshie and Duo: ::Sweatdrops::  
  
Jackie: Drags Sesshie and Duo back to corner doing something Jackieish::  
  
Jenn: GET A ROOM!  
  
Jackie: I'm in one!  
  
Jenn: NOT THIS ONE! THERE ARE OTHER PEOPLE HERE WHO MIND!  
  
Jackie: ::Mutters and Drags Sesshie and Duo out the door::  
  
Jenn: ::Sighs:: ::Glances at Legolas:: Yummy!  
  
Legolas: ::Blushes::  
  
Wufei: ::Gets up:: Baka Onna! You will pay for this injustice!  
  
Jenn: ::Glares::  
  
All except Wufei: ::Backs up::  
  
Jenn: ::Glare::  
  
Wufei: ::Glare::  
  
Jenn: ::Glare::  
  
Wufei: ::Tries to punch::  
  
Jenn: ::Counters punch and throws Wufei against wall before cleaning hands on jeans:: That takes care of that!  
  
Wufei: ::Remains unconscious::  
  
Everyone else: ::Sweatdrops::  
  
Jenn: ::Smiles brightly:: Why are you looking at me like that?  
  
Legolas: ::Smiles at Jenn:: ~ She knows how to fight back! YAY! I don't have to protect her! Perfect! ~  
  
Jenn: ::Starts glaring at everyone who is not Legolas and not occupied with other things:: ::Pulls out the Un-godly sized Hammer 'o' Doom:: DO you have something to say?  
  
Everyone paying attention except Legolas: ::Looks afraid::  
  
Legolas: ::Looks happy::  
  
Jenn: ::Chases some people around the room with the gigantic Hammer:: Come back her and face me! Cowards!  
  
Autumn: ::Grabs Naraku and drags him out of danger, then out of the room::  
  
Jenn: ::Continues assault while laughing evilly::  
  
Those being chased: ::Runs out door into the REAL world::  
  
Jenn: DAMN! Spoiled all my fun they did!  
  
Legolas: I can think of some other FUN things to do  
  
Jenn: ::Blushed a strawberry red:: okay.  
  
Jenn and Legolas: ::Walks out door::  
  
Everyone else left in room: ::Goes back to their own world::  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
All right! How did you like the rampant thought in my head? Funny? Disturbing? No comments? It's one in the morning so I'm finishing this and going to bed. I may write more. I may not. It all depends on you! And that the thoughts provided by being cooped up at work and at home all weekend don't go away! Ok! Review now!  
  
Signing Out ~ DevilWench ~ 


	2. The Hobbits will travel 1

For Kitta, The Merry Murderess  
  
P.S. She helped write this! You have been warned! There is bashing in this fic! As well as OOC! Again, you have been warned!  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing! That includes LotR! So, get a life and stop bugging me!! ::Glares::  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
PART 1  
  
~ Hobbit Journey ~  
  
Frodo: I think we should go visit Bilbo tomorrow. I haven't seen him in so long!  
  
Sam: TOMORROW?!?!?! That's not much time to pack Mr. Frodo!  
  
Merry: ::From Doorway:: You're not going anywhere without us Frodo!  
  
Pippin: ::Bounces in:: That's right! You're not leaving us behind! You need people of intelligence on this ...thing.  
  
Merry: That leaves you out again Pip!  
  
Pippin: ::Shoves Merry:: That's not a nice thing to say! ::Pouts::  
  
Frodo: ::Giggles::  
  
Merry: Awww...Pip...You know I didn't mean it!  
  
Pippin: ::Perks up:: YAY!  
  
Sam: Now Mr. Frodo, I should go start packing if we're leaving so soon. ::Leaves::  
  
Frodo, Merry, Pippin: ::Huddle::  
  
Frodo: Did you find him?  
  
Merry: Sure did! Hiding in the mountains just as you said Frodo. All crispy fried from falling in the Volcano.  
  
Frodo: Good  
  
Pippin: What's he going to do to the Mamma's boy?  
  
Frodo: Why ask me? I don't know! Eat him I guess.  
  
Pippin: ::Shudders:: I don't envy him. Tough to eat things that are THAT fat!  
  
Frodo: So you told him where we'll be?  
  
Pippin: Yep! WE told him we would be leaving the Shire by way of the Brandywine Bridge! And that if he waits there for us, he'll get a nice tasty reward! The Fat Hobbit Himself!  
  
Frodo: Good Let's start packing. We don't want to keep him waiting for too long! Plus I can't take his attitude for much longer!  
  
~ NEXT DAY ~  
  
Sam: Why do I have to carry everything Mr. Frodo? ::Carrying his, Frodo's, Pippin's and Merry's packs::  
  
Merry: Because that's what you do Sam! Sam the Pack Mule!  
  
Sam: ::Grumbels::  
  
Frodo: ::Snickers::  
  
~ The four Hobbits near the Brandywine Bridge ~  
  
Gollum: Gollum, Gollum...What crosses out bridge precious? Is it tasty? Is it good to eat? ::Climbs out from under the bridge:: It's Hobbitses! MASTER!!!!!  
  
Frodo: Hello Smegól! How are you?  
  
Gollum: We is happy to see the MASTER! ::Glares at Sam:: But not the Fat Hobbitses! We wants to EAT him!  
  
Frodo: Go ahead Smegól!  
  
Sam: MR.FRODO!!! You can't mean that!  
  
Frodo: He'd make a good Pie I think.  
  
Gollum: ::Drools:: Fat Hobbitses Pie...We likes that!  
  
Sam: ::Pales:: Mr. Frodo! Stop Joking! It's not funny!  
  
Kitta: Bounces in from somewhere:: Sure it is! Wonderful wonderful wonderful idea! ::Pets Gollum::  
  
Gollum: MISTRESS!!! ::Purrs::  
  
Pippin: Mistress?  
  
Kitta: Yep! That's me!  
  
Sam: Why would an Elf be the mistress of this freakish creature?  
  
Kitta: ::Yells:: TAKE THAT BACK!!!! The only freakish creature here is you! Fat hobbit! ::Glares at Sam::  
  
Sam: ::Cowers in his cloak::  
  
Kitta: ::Smirks:: ::Peers at Pippin::  
  
Pippin: Heh heh heh...::Worried::  
  
Kitta: ::Glomps Pippin:: You're CUTE!  
  
Pippin: ::Blushes::  
  
Everyone else: ::Sweatdrops::  
  
Gollum: ::Advances on Fat Hobbit::  
  
Sam: ::Notices Gollum:: BACK YOU DEVIL! MR.FRODO! HOW COULD YOU LET 'IM?!?!?  
  
Frodo: Because you are annoying!  
  
Kitta: That's right! I the Almighty Kitta knows this to be true! ::Laughs evilly::  
  
Gollum: ::Jumps Sam and grabs his frying pan...Hits him in the head with it::  
  
Sam: ::Dead::  
  
Frodo: Well done Smegól!!  
  
Everyone but Frodo: ::Sets up camp::  
  
Frodo: ::Stares into the Fire:: 'How could I ever have though Sam was a good Hobbit?!?! He was overbearing and insufferable! No wonder his Dad and Rosie threw him out!'  
  
Kitta: We're cannibals! Awesome!  
  
Gollum: ::Creates Pie a la Sam:: Fat Hobbitses make Yummy pies!  
  
Frodo: I thought he might!  
  
Pippin, Merry and Kitta: ::Cooks pies a la Sam::  
  
Pippin: ::Eats Pie:: Merry! This is GOOD!  
  
Merry: ::Eats Pie:: Yes Pip! I know!  
  
Kitta: YUMMY YUM YUM!!!  
  
~ After Sam in devoured ~  
  
Frodo: That was good! His best meal ever! A bit rubbery though!  
  
Gollum: It's the fat from the Fat Hobbitses. It's not good. We didn't like it.  
  
Kitta: Awww...Poor Smegól! Kitta will make it all better! ::Gives him Pepto- Bismol::  
  
Gollum: We does feel better! Thank-You Mistress!  
  
Kitta: AWWWW...Kawaii!!! (SP?) ::Glomps Gollum::  
  
Gollum: Mistress! Mistress! We cannot breath!  
  
Kitta: Oops...Sorry!  
  
Gollum: Gollum Gollum  
  
Kitta: ::Leans on Pippin:: Much Better!  
  
~ End Part 1 ~  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
OK...Part one done! 3 more to go! It will get funnier! I swear on my honor as the DevilWench!  
  
Signing Out ~ DevilWench ~ 


	3. False Beard 2

Again, For Kitta, the Merry Murderess; Who helped me with the ideas in this fic!  
  
Warning: OOC and random Wackiness!  
  
Disclaimer: Why do I have to keep telling you this! I don't own anything! Now go away!!! ::Sulks in a corner:: I just wish I did own LotR! At least Legolas!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
PART 2  
The Journey of the Three  
  
Giant: ::BOOM BOOM BOOM:: I'M HUNGRY!!!  
  
DW: ::Is carrying the Un-Godly Sized Hammer (Called UGH for now on):: Don't Worry! I'm sure that there's a Dwarf around here somewhere! I should know! I'm the ALL KNOWING DEVILWENCH!!!!  
  
Giant: ALRIGHT LITTLE FRIEND.  
  
~ Elsewhere ~  
  
Legolas: 'I wish Gimli would shut up! All these Dwarf stories are getting monotonous!'  
  
Gimli: And never have you seen such craftsmanship! (Blah Blah Blah!)  
  
Aragorn: 'If he doesn't shut up soon, I'm going to kill him myself!!!'  
  
(Little do they know)  
  
DW: ::Is walking near the Giant:: ::Sees Legolas, Aragorn, and other:: Hey! Giant!  
  
Giant: WHAT?  
  
DW: I found you your lunch! Straight ahead!  
  
Giant: YUMMY! ::Grabs Gimli::  
  
Legolas and Aragorn: 'YAY!' ::Remains stoic::  
  
Gimli: Legolas! Aragorn! Help me! It's ripping out the beard! OUCH!  
  
Giant: ::Rips out the entire beard:: HAIR IS NOT YUMMY...  
  
DW: ::Yells:: Especially since it's all fake!  
  
All: ::Stares at DW::  
  
DW: ::Smirks:: It's true! ::Giggles::  
  
Gimli: ::Glowers at DW:: You just HAD to tell them didn't ...  
  
Giant: ::Eats Gimli:: Bleah...OLD MEAT...NOT GOOD EATING...  
  
DW: Aww...I'm sorry! I hope you find a good replacement soon my friend! I plan on annoying these nice people for now! They're going to run into Kitta soon! ::Does Happy Dance::  
  
Giant: ::Starts to Leave::  
  
DW: Just wait one Minute! Now, you promised that you wouldn't step on anymore towns! You do and I will bash your skull in! ::Looks insanely evil::  
  
Giant: ::Blanches:: YEAH...I KNOW!!!  
  
DW: ::Looks innocent and happy again:: OK! Bye Bye then! ::Waves::  
  
Aragorn: Umm.Miss? We never said that you could come with us!  
  
DW: I didn't ask! I just am! ::Smirks:: I am the All knowing DevilWench!  
  
Aragorn: If you're all knowing then answer one question that I would really like to know!  
  
DW: I am NOT going to tell you the color of Legolas' Boxers!  
  
Legolas: O.O WHAT!!!!!!!!  
  
Aragorn: ::Blushes::  
  
DW: ::Leans towards Aragorn and whispers:: They're purple!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
And yet another one is complete! I hope you loves it Kitta!! ::Hugs::  
  
Signing out ~ DevilWench ~ 


	4. Pink Boxers? 3

Again For Kitta, the Merriest of Murders! Warning: She gave me some ideas! There is OOC and humor here! If you have a medical condition that prohibits you from finding something amusing, DO NOT READ THIS!  
  
Disclaimer: Don't ask, Don't tell! Heh heh heh...  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Part 3  
A Man Apart  
  
Boromir: ::Is all alone walking towards Rivendell:: I'm all alone! Oh, Woe is me! Why would no one wish to travel with me?  
  
~ Flash Back behind Boromir's back ~  
  
Faramir: I don't want to go with him! You go!  
  
Guard 1: Not for all the gold in Middle Earth would I go with THAT Nut Case!  
  
Guard 2: ::Shakes his head frantically:: Me neither!  
  
Guard 3: ::Runs screaming out the door::  
  
Faramir: ::Sighs:: I guess I'll have to handle it... ::Walks out to his brother:: Boromir! I am sad to inform you that all the guards are already assigned to other posts and cannot join you, and as protectorate of the White City, I cannot join you either. ::Pretends to feel sad about this::  
  
Boromir: That is alright brother! There is no need for anyone to accompany me! For I am Strong! And I came back from the dead! ::Leaves for Rivendell::  
  
Faramir: Good riddance! Hey boys! Who needs a drink! On me! ::Walks into the Pub::  
  
Guards: ::Cheer:: (For the beer and the fact that the highly annoying brother of their captain was gone! For a long while too!)  
  
~ End Flashback ~  
  
~ Now, because Boromir is such a bonehead, he lost his map! And you know guys (A/N: Sorry guys, but mostly it's true!) that guys won't ask for directions and are easily lost! So, our torturee is lost in record time in the Forest of the Amazons and other, more deadly creatures! ~  
  
Boromir: ::Tries to sing::  
  
Birds: ::Drop dead from the ghastly song::  
  
Boromir: ::Is unaware::  
  
Amazon 1: MAN! KILL IT!!!!!  
  
Amazon 2: NO EAT IT!!!  
  
Amazon 3: NO, BRING IT TO THE QUEEN!!!  
  
Amazons 4&5: ::Strips Boromir of all his clothes, minus his neon pink boxers, and ties him up to a pole and carry him like a pig roast::  
  
Boromir: 'How humiliating!'  
  
Dangerous Creature 1: Cheep Cheep Cheep...  
  
Amazons: ::Pause in Fear::  
  
Dangerous Creature 1: Cheep Cheep Cheep...  
  
Amazons: ::Drop Boromir on his head and run away screaming in horror::  
  
~ Into Boromir's view comes a creature that could only come from a nightmare. They are 6 feet tall Bunnies, with Purple fuzzy fur. They are soo cute that they are nauseating. ~  
  
Boromir: Aww... They're so cute! I want to pinch them!  
  
Big Purple Bunny of Dementia 1: ::Glares at Boromir::  
  
BPBoD 2: ::Upends the Pole that Boromir is tied too, therefor letting Boromir sit on the ground while tied to the pole::  
  
Rest of BPBoD: ::Do the Macarania(SP?) Around Boromir::  
  
Boromir: O.O What the Hell are they doing? IT'S SO CUTE!!!!  
  
Entire Tribe of BPBoD: ::Stop the previous dance, and start dancing indian style around him::  
  
Boromir: ::Begins to worry::  
  
BPBoD: ::Piles wood around Boromir::  
  
Boromir: ::Sweatdrops:: 'I may be in a little trouble here'  
  
~ As this is happening, Aragorn, Legolas, and DW, come walking by! ~  
  
Aragorn: Hey! Isn't that that guy we know?  
  
Legolas: The annoying one?  
  
Aragorn: Yeah! That's him!  
  
Legolas: Looks like the BPBoD are going to have a BBQ!  
  
DW: BBQ! YAY! PARTY TIME! ::Joins in with the dancing BPBoD::  
  
Boromir: Aragorn, Legolas! My friends! Help me! I think they mean to harm me!  
  
Aragorn, and Legolas: ::Shrug::  
  
Legolas: Time to go DW!  
  
DW: Aww...But they throw some kick @$$ parties!  
  
Aragorn: You can stay...  
  
DW: YAY! BBQ TIME!  
  
Aragorn: But we're leaving!  
  
DW: ::Grumbles but follows::  
  
Boromir: WAIT! WHAT ABOUT ME?  
  
DW: You are the main course for my friends here!  
  
Tribe of BPBoD: ::Lick lips:: 'YUM'  
  
DW: BYE BYE!!!!  
  
~ Aragorn, Legolas and DW leave. ~  
  
Tribe of BPBoD: CHOW TIME!!!! ::lights fire around Boromir::  
  
Boromir: ::Yowls like a cat::  
  
~ As his agonized screams, pleasantly filter through the trees, the three travelers stay on course to Rivendell. Knowing that they will arrive shortly! ~  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Alright! One maybe two more parts to this mini-series!  
  
Signing out ~ DevilWench ~ 


	5. Tasty Elf 4

For Kitta, The Merry Murderess, as always in this Mini-Series!  
  
Disclaimer: Again? Read previous chapters!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Part Four  
You're no Lady  
  
~ We join everyone who hasn't been eaten as they approach Rivendell ~  
  
Pippin: LOOK! It's Aragorn and Legolas! Hurray! But who's that? ::Points to DW::  
  
Kitta: DW!!!!!! YAY!!!!! ::Runs over::  
  
DW: KITTA!!!!! YAY!!!! ::Runs over::  
  
Both: ::Glomp::  
  
Everyone else: ::Sweatdrops::  
  
Frodo: I think they know each other...  
  
Merry: You think?  
  
Elladan and Elrohir: ::Run out:: Estel!!!  
  
Aragorn: Brothers!!!  
  
The 3 brothers: ::Hug::  
  
Kitta and DW: ::Look at the hugging brothers::  
  
Kitta: ::Glomps the twins::  
  
DW: Shrugs, Turns, and smacks someone in the face with the UGH (Un-Godly Sized Hammer)  
  
Arwen: ::Covers bloody, broken nose:: Ouchie!  
  
DW: ::Shrugs and swings UGH...Breaks Arwen's leg::  
  
Kitta: Torture time! ::Draws Sword:: Muahahahahah! ::Cuts off all her Hair::  
  
Arwen: ::Is now almost completely bald::  
  
~ And so, with one broken leg, a broken nose, and a very bad hair cut, she flees the company, and her former lover who only looks disgusted with himself for ever liking her. ~  
  
DW: That was fun!  
  
Kitta: I agree!  
  
Aragorn: ::To himself:: Why o why did I ever think I was in love with THAT Prissy elf!  
  
DW: ::Pats his shoulder:: so'kay  
  
Kitta: Group Huddle!  
  
All: ::Huddle::  
  
Kitta: Alright! Now here's what we have to do!  
  
All: ::Listens intently::  
  
Kitta: We must utterly destroy her!  
  
DW: Not to the death! That's too good for her! She must suffer slowly!  
  
All: ::Nods::  
  
Kitta: Now how should we go about this?  
  
DW: Take away all her dresses! She'll have to walk around Naked! ::Thinks:: We should be gone that entire day! I don't want to see THAT ever!  
  
All: ::Nods::  
  
Kitta: Clip her nails!  
  
Frodo: Put her on a cleaning detail  
  
Pippin: Make her cook! ::Thinks:: Then again.don't! I want to live another day!  
  
Merry: ::Chuckles::  
  
All: ::Whisper plans for Arwen Torment::  
  
~ The Next Day ~  
  
Arwen: ::Screams:: My clothes! Where are my Clothes!  
  
Everyone else: ::Snickers::  
  
~ A second Later ~  
  
Arwen: MY WIG!!!!! WHERE IS MY WIG????!?!?!?!?!?  
  
Everyone else: ::Guffaw::  
  
DW: Me thinks it has begun!  
  
Kitta: Indeed ::Glomps the twins and Pippin::  
  
DW: ::Sweatdrops:: Uh...shouldn't we go on to phase two?  
  
Kitta: ::While hanging onto the three men:: Oh, Yeah! What was part three again?  
  
DW: ::Sighs:: You'll find out!  
  
Legolas: What are you planning?  
  
DW: ::Giggles:: We girls, snuck into the bathhouse and put dye into the water!  
  
Legolas: What color?  
  
DW: Remember Boromir's Boxers?  
  
Legolas: O.O You are good!  
  
DW: ::Grins and glomps Legolas::  
  
Legolas: ::Blushes::  
  
Aragorn: ::Laughs:: You're blushing!  
  
Legolas: Am not!  
  
Aragorn: Are too!  
  
Legolas: Am not!  
  
Aragorn: Are too!  
  
Legolas: ::Tackles Aragorn::  
  
DW: ::Looks at the two men wrestling on the ground:: They never grow up! ::Walks off to get a prime position for the torture session::  
  
~ Two hours later, as the coloring time approaches, there are no close seats left. Much to Kitta's, Pippin's, Elladan's and Elrohir's disappointment ~  
  
(You gotta wonder what they were doing!)  
  
DW: Here it comes!  
  
Arwen: ::Screams bloody murder::  
  
DW: ::Smirks:: Perfect!  
  
Arwen: ::Charges out of the bath house clothes only in a towel:: WHO DID THIS! They will pay!  
  
Everyone: ::Disperses::  
  
DW: ::Cackles::  
  
Kitta: ::Gives DW a high Five::  
  
Aragorn: Part two: Complete!  
  
Legolas: Part Three: IN progress!  
  
DW and Legolas: ::Laugh evilly and walk off together::  
  
Kitta: Did I miss something?  
  
Pippin: Yep!  
  
Elladan and Elrohir: You were too busy with us!  
  
Kitta: ::Blushes::  
  
Aragorn: ::Laughs::  
  
Kitta: ::Drags Pippin, Elladan and Elrohir off::  
  
Frodo: ::To Merry:: What's Part Three? I think I was laughing too hard to catch that!  
  
Merry: We make her think that she doesn't exist anymore!  
  
Frodo: Ah...wonderful!  
  
Merry: That's not all!  
  
Frodo: What else is there?  
  
Merry: We lock her in a room with Gollum  
  
Frodo: NOOO!!! Poor Smegól!  
  
Merry: ::Laughs evilly::  
  
~ And so the day goes by. Arwen is ignored, and has to do everything for herself for once in her long life. (A/N: Take that you prissy elf!) She begins to feel disorientated! ~  
  
DW: Oh, Arwen! There you are!  
  
Arwen: YOU CAN SEE ME????!!!??!?!?!  
  
DW: What ever do you mean? Everyone can see you! You're bright neon pink!  
  
Arwen: ::Cries:: It was horrible! It felt like I didn't exist anymore! Not even father seemed to know I was around!  
  
DW: 'Huzzah! It's working!' It's ok sweety! Now, you must have had a very long day. Let me take you to your room. Get some sleep. 'If you can!' ::Laughs evilly::  
  
Arwen: ::Notices that she wasn't at HER door:: What is this? Where am I? What are you trying to do?  
  
Legolas: ::Jumps out from the shadows and helps DW shove the prissy elf in the room::  
  
DW: ::Locks the door::  
  
Everyone else: ::Waits for the scream::  
  
~ They are not disappointed ~  
  
Arwen: ::Screams the most piercing scream yet::  
  
DW: ::Gives everyone a hug for helping::  
  
~ The next morning ~  
  
DW: ::Unlocks the door::  
  
Arwen: ::Bursts from the room::  
  
Gollum: She was tasty!  
  
~ The Prissy elf was never seen again by anyone! Huzzah ~  
  
Aragorn: Well, now that she's gone, I have no one to be queen...  
  
DW: ::Smirks:: Well...There was that pretty She-Elf at the dinner last night!  
  
Aragorn: ::Considers for a moment before running off::  
  
Gollum: ::Runs after tasty elf:: WAIT PRECIOUS!!!  
  
Frodo: Well, I think I should be getting home now. So Good Bye to all of you!  
  
Merry: I'm going too! Can't leave him alone for a second! You know the trouble he gets into when alone!  
  
Pippin: ::Is snagged by Kitta:: I'm staying right here! With my Kitta!  
  
Elladan and Elrohir: YOUR KITTA?!!?!?!?!?! SHE'S OURS!!!!!  
  
The three: ::Begin fighting in the background while Kitta watches amusedly::  
  
DW: ::Snuggles with Legolas somewhere else:: GOOD NIGHT TO ALL!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
And here it all ends! The end of the mini-series. I hope you all enjoyed!  
  
Signing Out ~ DevilWench ~ 


	6. GW hammered

Alrighty then! Here is another humor thingie for the greatness that is me! Muahahahahahah!!! Cower before me all you minions!! This is a short interlude!  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing  
  
Note/Warning: I am lazy and slaphappy right now. This is short, simple, and tells you why no ones gets on my bad side!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
~ Scene: On the dusty road somewhere near a forest ~  
  
DW: ::Is trudging along with the UN-Godly Sized Hammer(Will be called UGH for now on) slung over her shoulder:: Sooo Bored... Must find something to bash...  
  
~ An SUV drives by and splashes mud all over DW ~  
  
DW: ::Growls:: YOU WILL PAY FOR THAT!!! GOD DAMNED SUV'S!!!! ::Chases SUV ::  
  
~ Meanwhile in the SUV ~  
  
Quatre: Do you hear something?  
  
Duo: Nahh...Just the wind.  
  
Heero: ::Is driving::  
  
Trowa: ::Is not present::  
  
Wufei: ::Has been tied, gagged, and stuffed in the trunk by Quatre for being rude:: hhhhooonnnnddddd hhhhhaaaasssssshhhhhhrrrrrrrrr!!!! (A/N: if you don't understand gag talk he's saying 'Blond Bastard' the bad boy!)  
  
~ Suddenly the back end gets smashed, narrowly missing Wufei~  
  
~ Back to DW ~  
  
DW: I will get them! I'm catching up!!! ::Evil laughter followed by the swinging of the UGH  
  
~ Crunch ~  
  
DW: Ahhh... what a wonderful sound!  
  
~ SUV stops ~  
  
Heero: ::Gets out and pulls gun on DW:: I'm the only one allowed to destroy the vehicle.  
  
DW: ::Throws UGH and hits Heero in the head::  
  
Heero: ::Is knocked into La-La Land::  
  
Duo: Dude! She knocked Heero out in one blow! Man this chick is good!  
  
DW: ::Retrieves UGH and Smashed Duo's foot into the ground:: What dod you call me?  
  
Duo: ::Panics:: Uhh uhh...I said the really strong person over there!  
  
DW: ::Glares and swings UGH around::  
  
Duo: ::Is in the same place as Heero::  
  
Quatre: ::Sweatdrops:: Umm...please excuse my friends. They're very rude sometimes...::Ducks as UGH whooshes past his head:: AHHHHH!!!!! ::Runs away screaming::  
  
DW: ::Shouts:: GIRL!!!!  
  
Wufei: ::Thinks:: I'm so glad I'm gagged so I won't even be noticed let alone knocked out by an onna!  
  
DW: ::Trashes the SUV::  
  
Wufei: Why me?  
  
DW: Ahhh.I feel better now! ::Walks down the road whistling a happy tune while three boys are left in La-La land and one is off peeing his pants::  
  
~ A Mini van with 9 people in it comes trundling up the road ~  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Next time...yeah.  
  
Signing out ~ DevilWench ~ 


End file.
